5 Things You Need To Do In Order To Find Your Soulmate.
There are plenty of people in the world who are in pursuit of their soulmates. You might even be one of those people. You find yourself constantly daydreaming about eventually finding that person who is meant for you. You fantasize about eventually falling in love with someone who you know you’re going to spend the rest of your life with.
The vast majority of people in the world just aren’t going to be so lucky in their pursuit of love. Sometimes, it can take a really long while before you would be able to find your soulmate. And the wait might not necessarily be an easy or simple one.
You might think that you’re just plain unlucky and that your partner is still out there looking for you. You keep on dating different people, but no one seems to be a good fit. You keep on trying to put yourself out there, but things just never seem to work to your advantage. No matter how hard you try to attract love into your life, it just doesn’t seem to want to show up or reveal itself to you.
If this is the case, then you might want to consider the very real possibility that perhaps you’re just not ready for love just yet. Maybe your soulmate hasn’t shown themselves to you because the universe knows that you aren’t ready to meet them. Perhaps there are plenty of things that you need to do to make yourself ready to be in a relationship with your soulmate. Remember that love isn’t something that you can just rush. It’s only going to come to you whenever the time is ripe for it to do so. You can’t force the issue if it just isn’t meant to be.
It would be a real waste of love if your soulmate comes into your life before you’re ready to take them in. What will end up happening is that you would try to make things work but you just wouldn’t have the capacity to do so. And that’s going to result in a heartbreak that is going to be really difficult to recover from. That’s why you want to make sure that you are doing everything you can to ready yourself for that soulmate kind of love.
But what exactly do you need to do to make sure that you’re ready for your soulmate? Well, here are a few things that you might want to keep in mind:
1. Practice full honesty with yourself and with people you love.
Always make sure that you practice full honesty with yourself and with those you love. You don’t want to be misleading or deceiving yourself when it comes to what you want out of relationships.
2. Learn what it means to engage in self-love.
You are going to learn how to fall in love with yourself first. Once you understand what it means to love yourself, you’re going to make it easier for your soulmate to fall in love with you as well. You are essentially giving them a blueprint on how to love you.
3. Make sure that you are an independent soul.
A lot of people make the mistake of thinking that soulmate relationships always require codependence. But that isn’t really the case. Soulmate relationships have two independent souls that commit to living life together with a purpose.
4. Always stay true to who you really are on the inside.
You are always going to want to make sure that you stay true to who you are on the inside. You have to make sure that you don’t feel compelled to be anyone else other than who you’re meant to be. Your soulmate will not recognize you if you keep on acting like someone you’re not.
5. Believe that you are deserving of that soulmate kind of love.
And of course, you need to believe that you are deserving of the soulmate kind of love. Your belief in the capacity of love to be magical, amazing, and wondrous is what is going to keep you away from relationships that are not right for you; the kinds of relationships that force you to settle.
FINAL THOUGHTS
At the end of the day, love isn’t always going to come just because you want it to. It’s not just a matter of will. It’s also a matter of making sure that you are prepared to handle it when it does come. You might have even met your soulmate already. But since you’re not really ready to receive them as your soulmate, you haven’t really seen them in that light just yet.
So instead of going out and looking for your soulmate in the world, maybe you should just try looking deep within yourself. Perhaps you should consider that the work that you need to do can be found inside of you. And once you’re ready, then that’s when love is going to make itself known to you.
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Being ok with being disliked is the number one life skill.
We all want to be liked.
It means safety, gifts, validation, a sense of confidence.
I can relate.
My actions over the last 23 years have absolutely been influenced by a deep need to be liked.
It’s why social media works so well.
We get a very real hit of dopamine when someone likes our post or smiles at us in the street.
We’re not far off from those rats given cocaine pellets in an experiment.
They could not stop the need for continual dopamine hits and became easy addicts, giving up on their health entirely just so they could get that hit.
Validation is addictive.
And it makes total sense.
But in our need for being liked, we also introduce a dangerous mechanism into our lives.
Why?
Because if we rely on other people to feel good…
Other people have the power to make us feel bad too.
We are at the mercy of the external.
This is death to self-expression, creativity and ongoing happiness.
It’s not down to us.
How fragile this makes us.
But it’s all about perspective.
The minute we realise that other people’s opinions have absolutely no bearing on our self-worth, we’re free.
We’re free to act without the fear of a painful repercussion:
That illusory sense that we have esteem or ‘worth’ to lose.
There is no connection.
Our self-esteem is endless and abundant when we allow it to flow through us like a river after a torrential downpour.
If we can be ok with the idea of being disliked nothing can stop us.
This is a practice.
A habit.
An unwiring.
But you’ve already made 90% of the progress you need through understanding that your confidence is based on you…
Not anyone else.
Be ok with being disliked.
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Things emotionally intelligent people do to create powerful conversations.
1. Don't multitask
You need to do more than just turn off your phone
It involves being fully present in that moment. Don't think about yesterday or what you'll do tonight, or what you should say next
You can either fully listen to the person or leave the conversation.
2. Don't preach
Conversations aren't blogs where you state your opinion without comments from others
Assume you have something to learn in every conversation. The best way to truly listen to someone is to set yourself aside and listen as if they know something you do not.
3. Use open-ended questions. Start your questions with:
Who
Why
What
When
Where
or How
If you ask, "were you terrified?" you will receive a one-word answer. If you ask, "what was that like?" you will get a thoughtful, meaningful answer.
4. Go with the flow
There will be thoughts that pop into your head; your job is to let them go. There is no need to say everything that comes to mind, and you do not need to wait for "just the right time"
Let your thoughts come and go without judgment.
5. If you don't know, say it
This principle is straightforward
Be very careful talking about things that you're not an expert at. It is better to err on the side of caution
Pretend you'll be on the record and held accountable for your words
Don't make things up.
6. Don't equate your experience with theirs
If they talk about losing a loved one, don't talk about when your mom died. If they're discussing their problems, don't discuss your own issues
It is not always about you, so avoid bringing the conversation back to you.
7. Don't repeat yourself
Repetition is condescending and boring. People usually do this when they have a point to make, and they say it repeatedly.
Don't do that
It's not enjoyable for anyone.
